


I Won't Let You Go [Title pending]

by JChateauneuf



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But no apocalypse yet, Crime Fighting, F/F, Heda Lexa, Science Experiments, Vigilante Clarke, Vigilante Lexa, Walkers (Walking Dead), Wanheda Clarke Griffin, commander - Freeform, gone wrong
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-10-31 22:18:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17858009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JChateauneuf/pseuds/JChateauneuf
Summary: *** WORK PRESENTLY PAUSED BECAUSE OF SCHOOL. SHOULD BE ABLE TO WORK BACK ON IT SUMMER 2019 :)***Clarke, a med student, is doing a research project on a leading company in vaccine research/development. When she gets an interview with the head of a Department, she ends ups at the wrong address: the company’s facility where their illegal experiments are « hidden », caged into an abandoned building.Lexa, once a hitman, and is now the leader of a large group of rebels aware of the company's illegal experiments who are trying to stop them.They meet and they fall for each other in their quest to stop the Walker Apocalypse. This was not a spoiler.Will they succeed? Now that would be a spoiler.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic ever, I don't really know how long it is going to be. I'm counting on posting regularly, so hopefully, you won't have to wait for too long between each chapters.
> 
> Also, English is not my first language and I don't use any kind of proof-reading, so I apologize for any typo or syntax mistakes hidden here and there.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> JC

**[Lexa :]**

The hallway was dark, only lit by the dying daylight that was poorly peeping from the windows. Nothing but trees and moutains outside. The old factory stood alone in the middle of nowhere, abandonned, deserted.

Or so people thought.

The building was not empty.

Walkers.

That’s how we called the experiments that were imprisonned within these walls. They were once people like you and me, but the odds turned against them when they were subjected to an experimental treatment that turned them into living dead beings. Zombies, actual ones, who would feed from whatever meat they could get, especially human meat. It was caused by a virus developped by the experimental treatment. I have no idea whether the subjects were volunteers or whether they were actually kidnapped, picked out randomly or chosen according to some criterias. All I knew is that it was wrong. It was, and still is, my mission to put an end to it. To expose the guilty. They thought they had the virus contained, but what would happen in case of a breach? The virus would spread and I don’t want to imagine the repercussions of it.

You see, whenever you would die, no matter how, it would be a matter of minutes before you turned into a Walker. If you get bitten, it’s a matter of time and a terrible fever before you succomb to it. You can only end a Walker by stabbing or shooting it in the head. You have to break their skull. You would think it’s a simple solution, but tell me, how many people can actually defend themselves? How many people can shoot (well that is), how many people can plunge an axe into a skull, retrieve it and stab again and again before getting tired or before getting bitten from behind? Let’s be realistic.

Although, this is far from where we are now, I must still consider the worst scenarios. We must take them seriously in order to take action and move forward in stopping the guilty. I have never believed in violence in the name of science. I have never agreed with killing in the name of growth.

But don’t get me wrong : I don’t like people, God knows I have killed before. But I’m not barbaric. I only killed when I had enough concrete proof, when I was beyond a doubt about the other’s guilt. You could say I only targeted serial killers who would escape from the justice system, who slipped into the cracks. When the guilty walked free, only one thing remained for justice to be done : _blood must have blood_. That is my motto and the reason why I am no hero.

I kill, heroes don’t.

Heroes save people, I murder them.

So I was stealthily walking through the hallways of the abandonned factory where the Walkers were hidden. I had to kill every Walker I could find as quietly as I could. I was equipped with many blades : a black sword (halfway between sword and machette), a hunting knife on my right thigh, a dagger on my left hip and a butterfly knife hidden in my boot. I also had a handgun on my right hip, just in case.

The hallway was pretty much your typical horror movie taking place in a haunted asylum, but I knew I was facing Walkers, not evil spirits. My breathing was calm, my pace steady. Then, I heard a small rumbling : footsteps ahead, ten o’clock. It was too fast to be a Walker – they usually walked very slowly, without direction, until they found a prey (even then, they were not able to run, they just had a direction). They also snarled; these footsteps were in a quiet hurry. I slid against the wall, narrowing my eyes, weapon up, waiting for the person to either walk straight ahead or turn and walk towards me.

My muscles tensed as the footsteps approached, adrenaline kicking in anticipating the encounter. But they never turned in my direction. I saw a flash of blond hair run by, followed by a high pitch scream moments after. Then I heard it. The snarls of Walkers. Many of them.

 

*

 

**[Clarke :]**

I parked my car outside the old factory and checked my GPS, eyes going from the building to my phone as if I could grasp what the heck was going on. Surely, this was not the address of the MountWeather Pharmaceuticals headquarters. This old creepy building could not be where the multi-billion company was based. I checked once again my emails where the address was included in the correspondance I had with Dr Tsing, whom I was supposed be interviewing for a school project. The addresses matched. I frowned: this couldn’t be right. I nevertheless got out of the car and walked up to the door, which was locked by a heavy chained and an equally heavy lock.

 _What the hell?_  

I was about to turn around, wondering what kind of a sick joke that was, when I saw a flash through one window. Someone in a white lab coat had moved quickly inside. So someone _was_ there. Dr Tsing?

I walked around the building and found a window I could crack open. That was the classic horror movie moment where the viewers scream at the idiot who runs right into the trap. I was the idiot, but curiosity won over safety: I just had to know what was going on in here.

I landed inside, as gracefully as I could (which is to say, not a lot) and randomly picked a direction to go. A closed door lead to dimly stairs: no way was I going down. I may be reckless, borderline suicidal some might even say, but not that much. I went up a flight then opened the door to a tighter hallway compared to the one downstairs. There were a lot of doors, all containing room of God knows what. It reminded me of a hospital in the way it was displayed. An abandonned hospital. Or a creepy asylum. _Remind me what was I still doing here?_

I walked down the corridor and noticed that some doors had yellow flags, others white. They were all locked.

All locked, but one with a red flag. As soon as I opened it, I understood why.

There was a man standing at the end of the room, looking out the window. His posture was slumped, arms hanging on his sides as if they were useless. He was making a strange guttural sound as his weight switched from one leg to another.

“Hello?”

I winced, never felt more stupid than at this moment. I could see myself yell at the movie, not understanding why anyone would make their presence known to the intruder-stranger-killer by saying a dumb “hello?”.

The man slowly turned around, making more noise than before. And I saw it.

I saw the mouth permanently opened, the head crooked to one side as if the neck was broken, the eyes as pale as a ice, the blood covering the whole body. The man slowly walked towards me, liquid spitting from his mouth as he snarled louder.

A shiver ran through my whole body as my instincts took over, screaming at my mind to either fight or flee. There was no choice really.

“Sir, are you alright?” I heard myself say.

The man brought his arms in front of him, clearly ready to latch at me.

_Okay, now Clarke, I know your intentions are good but for FUCKSAKE’S, RUN YOU DUMB BIMBO!_

Without wasting another second, I took my heels and literally ran for my life. Without closing the door.

_Goddamn it Clarke!_

I swung the door open and went up another flight. I was a bit relieved when I didn’t hear the man after me, after all, he did not seem in shape to run. But fuck, now I was stuck up here because I went up instead of down and now, I didn’t dare to go down the stairs. I walked in a hurry in the hallway, seriously questionning my capability to make choices. Good ones that is.

I saw there was an intersection ahead, but kept going past it, speeding up the pace into a light jog. Near the end of the hallway, I turned my head around to check if anyone (or anything) was lurking behind. I hung my arms in the air, ready to open a door.

I couldn’t hold back the scream when I fell.

I honest to God don’t know how I managed to do it, but I caught myself on the ropes and I quite literally hung for my life. Down in the elevator shaft were a couple of people in the same state as the man in the room. They all looked up at me when I screamed and now they were trying to catch me with their hands, their mouth stupidly open making all the same guttural noise.

I tried to pull myself on the rope, but I was too far away from the floor to hope to get to it. I knew it wasn’t going to be better up ahead (and that is supposing I could pull herself up for that long) and down wasn’t an option.

Knowing I was fucked, I closed my eyes, trying to calm my breathing, already feeling the panick attack. But the thought of the man in the room eventually caught up to me. Even though he was slow, he would probably catch up and then what? I was not willing to find out. I looked down at the people who were still snarling and in desperation, I yelled at them:

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?”

It’s as if my voice excited them, they started to press against each other as they moved more agressively. The shaft trembled a bit under their movements, after all, it _was_ old, and I had no idea what to expect if it ever gave up. Sure, we were not that high above the ground, but I didn’t know how many floors were underground and most of all, I didn’t know what I would do if I was to crash down with them. I would probably die, either from the injuries or under their number. Or both. This is not what I signed up for when I chose to do my project on MountWeather Pharmaceuticals.

 “Take my hand!" 

My head shot up to a woman’s face and a gloved hand. I took it and tried to pull a little on it so I could reach the wall, but my hand slipped against hers and I almost lost balance. I yelped in distress and closed my eyes, hanging on the rope with both of my hands again. 

“My forearm! Grab it!”

“I can’t!”

I couldn’t help the tear running down my face as fear had started to freeze my whole body.

“Look at me.”

The contrast between the firm order and the soft voice seemed to crack the marble that was my neck and I looked up at the arm that was still stretched out to me. I held up a tentative hand, my muscles started to tremble in tiredness despite the adrenaline. Before I could reach the arm, a firm hand grabbed my forearm.

“I won’t let you go. I promise.”

Somehow, I believed it with all of my being.

I felt a strain in my shoulder as I was being pulled up a bit.

“You have to let go of the rope so you can grab the edge of the floor with your other hand.” 

“Are you crazy!”

“I won’t let go of you.” She repeated. “Trust me.”

I took a deep breath, secretly prayed for my mom and my friends, and let go of the rope. I felt my arm pull under the weight of my body, but sure enough, the promise was kept and the woman held onto me enough so I could grab the edge of the floor with my other hand, relieving the pressure on my shoulder.

“Press your feet against the wall and try to pull yourself up. I’ll help you.”

I did as I was told and in what felt like a weird jump, I was back up on the floor, laying on the woman who had just saved me. Either she had underestimated her strength to pull me up or I underestimated my jumping skills. Probably the former one.

I was still trying to catch my breath on the stranger’s chest, lying on top of her, our arm still caught in their hold. This felt somehow intimate. _No, not the time_. When I straightened up my head to thank my savior, I was taken aback by a pair of green eyes.

 _Holy shit_.

My savior was… God. Freakin’ beautiful. Incredibly stunning. Fucking hot. Choose your pick.

I suddenly started to feel very conscious about our position. Me on top of this gorgeous woman who still hadn’t said a word, who still hadn’t looked away from my eyes. Hypnotized, I dwelled on the sound of her voice. Honey, cream, everything that is sweet in the world, and spicy and hot as I remembered how firm her words were.

_Fuck. Clarke, not the time to fantasize about a stranger. Sure, she saved your life and you would gladly sleep with her in return  if that’s what she wants (what the fuck are you saying?), but she’s still a stranger._

“I-huh.” I blurted, not really knowing how to speak anymore.

When my senses partially came back to me, I stood up and offered a hand to the woman to help her back up. 

“Thank you, for saving my life.” I said, my voice a bit raspy from all the stress.

“You should not be here.” 

Her voice was low, commanding, and _oh_ , how sexy. I could only look down at my feet, feeling my cheeks heat up as if I had been caught doing something I wasn’t supposed to. Come to think of it, that was probably the case. I somehow found the strength to look back up at the woman, thinking it was maybe her that I saw through the window and pushed me to break in.

But she was not wearing a white lab coat, no she was actually heavily armed, which worried me maybe a tiny little bit, wearing a tight black long sleeve shirt, fit black cargo pants and black military boots. She was also wearing leather gloves which had holes, a bit like the driving ones. Her hair was brown, tied up in a French braid, which only accentuaed her cheekbones and her jaw, which all seemed to have been cut out from marble by God Himself. She also had black paint over her face that went from one temple to the other, the bottom part following what looked like tears streaks down both cheeks. The dark make up only highlighted the green of her eyes, who were still looking at me with such intensity it started to make me nervous.

I knew this was not the time for innapropriate thoughts and heavy glances, but I just couldn’t help but stare. She looked like a modern amazon-queen-fighter. Up to now, I never knew I had that fantasy.

“What are you doing here?”

I couldn’t help but ask. As hot as she was, I still couldn’t ignore her weapons. She had a purpose coming here and she most likely was aware of what was going on in this place.

“What are _you_ doing here?” She responded.

“I got the wrong address. I thought I saw someone inside so I broke in through a window. What’s going on here?”

“You saw someone?”

Her eyes widened a bit, like she was suddenly worried.

“Yeah, they had a white lab coat on. What the fuck is this place?”

“We have to go.”

I didn’t have the time to protest that I was being pulled in the direction I came from.

“No we can’t go there! There’s a man like the ones down the elevator that was following me!”

The woman ignored me (I wondered it was deliberate or if she was half deaf) then turned in a different hallway. Maybe she did hear me after all.

She led us through a maze of corridors and hallways that all looked the same and I still wonder how we finally got out from a cracked window into the woods. My stranger still hadn’t let go of my hand as she made her way through the trees. It was completely dark when we finally ended up in the middle of nowhere and the woman started to scrape at a tree with her fingers under the moolight. _What the fuck?_ I was about to ask her when she pulled a part of the bark and retrived a duffle bag, a leather jacket and motorcycle helmet from their hiding place. She slipped her weapons into the bag and put on her jacket before turning to me.

“How did you get here?” She said.

“I-uh, my car is near the entrance of the building.”

I was still shocked by this… whatever that was. She nodded and took my hand as she led us deeper in the woods.

We arrived at a black motorcycle, the old school ones with a round beam light and low handles.

 

_No freakin’ way._

Another fantasy checked.

By the same woman.

This was becoming suspicous.

 

“What’s your name?” She said all of a sudden.

“Clarke.”

“Have you ever ridden a motorcycle Clarke?”

 _Oh_ the way she said my name, the way she held the _k_ at the end of it…

“Uh…n-no.” 

“It’ll be fine. Just hold onto me tight and keep your head down.”

I swallowed hard and I didn’t know if it was from the excitement of the motorcycle or from getting to touch her again. She offered me her helmet.

“What are you gonna wear?”

“It’s a short ride. I’d rather you take it.”

Her tone left no space to argue. 

“You will have to carry the bag though. I cannot since you will be holding onto me.”

I lost again the ability to talk and I knew it had to be because of the girl. I let her put the bag tightly around me so it was hanging flat across my back. The beast came alive in a roar and my stranger went on it first before gesturing to me. To be quite honest, I felt like I went straight up to Heaven when I held onto her again. She was tight under my embrace and I wondered if… _No. Not the time Clarkles_. After showing me where to put my feet, we swifted off into the night.


	2. Chapter 2

**[Lexa:]**

I had vaguely toyed with the idea of turning around just to teach a lesson to the reckless who came here under a dare or in search for a thrill. I had no patience for shallow show offs.

But that wasn’t me. Someone’s life was hanging in the balance and I couldn’t just turn a blind eye on it. Innocent until proven guilty.

“ _What the fuck is wrong with you !?_ ”

Well, she sounded mad. And desperate, understandibly so. I rushed over and looked down at the woman who was barely hanging on the rope. I stretched out my hand to her.

“Take my hand!”

Blue eyes shot at me for a second and I felt like I had been shot blind. Her hand slipped from mine, still a bit weak from the shock. I shook my head to regain my composure: she was in serious danger.

“My forearm! Grab it!”

I knew I’d have a better grip like this if I was going to pull her up.

“I can’t!”

She was starting to freeze, a panic attack lurking after each breath.

“Look at me.” I said softly but firmly.

Her eyes were starting to be empty with fear, but I still saw a glimpse of hope in them. I tried to hold on to it with my gaze, moving my fingers a bit, inciting her to try again. She weakly held out her hand and I stretched out mine even more to grab her arm firmly.

I had a good hold on her.

“I won’t let you go. I promise.”

Somehow, I believed it with all of my being.

It didn’t make sense, but I knew I would protect her with my life.

*

She probably thought I was ignoring her on purpose (she wouldn’t be too wrong) and I can’t even imagine what she must have thought when I started to scrape at the tree. She probably thought I was some serious lunatic walking around armed in an abandonned facility. I would probably star in her journal tonight.

Then again, I noticed how many times her eyes lingered on me, how they would flicker down to my lips. How she would sometimes flinch under my gaze and how that turned me on a bit too much for my own taste. Maybe I would star in her journal in a different way. 

Maybe I’d let her star in my daydreams.

“What’s your name?”

“Clarke.”

“Have you ever ridden a motorcycle Clarke?”

I relished in the way her name rolled in my mouth and on my lips. It took everything I had to not smirk when I saw she was affected as well.

_Oh Clarke, I will definitely see you later in my mind._

 

*

 

**[Clarke:]**

_“Do you know how to get to the highway from here?” She asked after putting her duffle bag around her._

_“I got my phone.”_

_She scoffed._

_“Follow me.”_

_“Who are you?”_

_The woman paused in her movements, seeming to contemplate what to say next._

_“Lexa.” She said locking her gaze with mine._

_I meant to ask for so much more than just the name, but_ fuck Lexa… _Once again, I was under the spell, hypnotized by the green eyes that were shining from the motorcycle’s beam. Lexa put on her helmet, cutting short the stare, but I could have sworn I saw the hint of a smirk before her face disappeared behind the tinted glaze._

_“Follow me Clarke. It’s not safe for us to stay here any longer.”_

_I knew I’d follow her at the end of the world if she asked me to._  

*

Raven decided we meet up at the new coffee shop that had just opened a few days ago. _Grounders_ , what a peculiar name I thought, but didn’t delve into it much more.

It had been four days since the abandonned factory. Four days since I thought I was going to die, but then was unexpectedly saved. For four long days, I had been haunted by green eyes.

But ultimately, I was not one to dwell in regrets. I was driven, I had a purpose: school and work kept me busy, if I wasn’t studying or doing research, I was more likely to be found working at the hospital. Nothing would keep me from becoming a doctor. Not the beef with my mom since my dad’s death, not even the grief that ensued, and certainly not the cheating asshole of an ex-boyfriend.

I received an email from Dr Tsing, claiming that her assistant had given me the wrong address, that the old factory was where the company first existed some 97 years ago when it was founded. It had been relocated since and she claimed they got rid of it, so it was not affiliated with them anymore. Whatever, there was something going on there and I just had to find out what. What if MountWeather _had_ something to do with it?

I came in the coffee shop and immediately liked the vibe of it. The tall windows stood from the floor to the ceiling, which was covered with tree branches, fake leaves and fairy lights. Vegetation was everywhere, the scenery was a mix of green, offwhite and brown. I kind of understood the name of the place: the coffee shop definitely had an earthy vibe to it. A forest oasis in a concrete city. It was very serene, the perfect place to study or just unwind.

I spotted Raven at a table by one of the windows, face so close from her comptuer screen I wasn’t sure whether she was fully immersed in her studies or looking at picutres of God-knows-who. I glanced at her screen from behind and saw pictures of a woman who happened to be a few tables away from us. 

“For God’s sake Raven, she’s _right_ there.”

“Why do you think I chose this spot, Captain Obvious?” She scoffed.

“That’s just plain disgusting. You’re stalking her like a perv and she’s literally a few tables away. Why don’t you just talk to her and be done with it?” 

“Because, Griffin, I have my methods.”

“Modern perv methods? Does it require you sticking your hand down your pants while you’re at it?”

She glared at me as I unpacked my stuff nonchalantly.

“No, Griffin, not yet anyway. But I just might stick it down _yours_ if you keep giving me ideas like this.”

It was my turn to scoff.

“After all, public places _are_ on my to-do list.” She said, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

I didn’t even bother to respond, burying my nose in my textbook. But it was useless, something else was on my mind. I opened my computer and started to review every single tab on the MountWeather Pharmaceuticals’ website for the hundredth time in the past four days. I knew I could have had some answers if I had just insisted with my savior. But I had been too struck to rationally think and demand answers because all of this was just plain fucked up. _Think with your brain, not your pants_ , I kept thinking, shaking my head. God I was so gay.

“What do you think she puts in her coffee?”

Raven was back a few inches from her screen. I rolled my eyes, knowing she wouldn’t drop it, and took another glance behind at the woman she was stalking.

She was tall with dirty blonde hair, high cheekbones, almond-shaped eyes, aquiline nose, slim figure, everything about her screamed “royal ascendance”. She really was pretty. Her eyes lifted up and she looked back at me. I felt my whole body shiver: I was scared as shit.

I turned back abruptly, facing Raven again who just snorted.

“Fuck off. Also, she probably takes it black.” 

“God Griffin, all the jokes I could be making right now…”

“Please don’t.”

“… I hope she likes them–“

The tiny bell rang when the door opened and Raven cut herself short, eyes widening and mouth still agape.

“Clarke, hot babe at twelve o’clock, I repeat, hot babe at twelve o’clock. We are never leaving this place.” 

I scowled at her. I was never going to be able to investigate peacefully here with Raven obsessing over everyone in the coffee shop and I certainly wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of looking at the supposedly “hot babe at twelve o’clock”. 

“Clarke Clarke Clarke, oh my God Clarke, they know each other!”

I was starting to wonder if it would be best to leave for the library. I could always grab my coffee to go.

I stoop up, ignoring Raven’s protest and went up to the counter to order. I started packing my things when I got back.

“Raven, you’re fucking useless and the absolute worst study buddy of all time.”

“You can’t blame a girl for staring…”

“You’re not staring. You’re stalking and talking about them, to me. Eye-fucking too.”

“You would too if you just looked at them!”

Raven’s tone was getting louder and in my will to avoid a scene, I bumped into someone as I was rushing out the door.

Of course, the body almost didn’t budge from the impact while I got thrown against the door. Great. I was hanging on the door, bag all over the floor, hand in the air in an attempt to save the coffee. At least, I managed to save it in all my natural grace. Yeah right.

I was about to apologize but a pair of piercing green eyes had drawn all words from my mouth.


	3. Chapter 3

**[Lexa:]**

I had spotted her as soon as I came in Grounders. My heart had skipped a beat, as it had done for the last four days every time I spotted a blonde head, but this time, I knew it was her. I felt a low growl in my chest, my inner animal ready for the game.

I sat beside Anya, never taking off my eyes from the back of her head.

“Watch out for her friend. I’m pretty sure she just mouthed you’re a ‘hot babe at twelve o’clock’.” 

I finally turned my gaze from her, spared a glance of acknowledgment to Anya, then waved at the barista who nodded in my direction. 

“Are you sure she wasn’t talking about you?” I asked. “She sure seems to be very interested in your figure.”

I returned my attention to the blonde who was waiting for her order at the counter.

“Well, can you blame her? I’m pretty sure she’s looking me up on her computer, but she was definitely talking about you. You should have seen her face when you sat beside me.”

I raised an eyebrow.

“Looking you up on internet? Careful now, you might just choke on your modesty.”

“Please.” Anya scoffed. “I know a thirsty girl when I see one. After all, I am sitting with you.”

I immediately glared at her.

“I’m not thirsty.”

“Yeah, right. And I supposed it’s not drool that I see at the corner of your mouth.”

“I am not thirsty. I am more than capable of getting what I want, when I want it.”

“ _Careful now, you might just choke on your modesty._ ”

I decided to ignore her, but did breathe a small “very mature”. I returned my gaze to the blonde who was now packing up her stuff, clearly embarrassed by her friend. I wondered if she would ever notice that I was right behind her.

We let the sounds of the coffee shop lay comfortably between us, as we were each eyeing our interest. Outwardly, we probably looked like two hungry wolves stalking their prey. Or two douchebags taking their picks, thinking they owned the place and everyone inside.

Then again, I suppose that wasn’t a total a lie.

We were two douchebags, there’s no doubt about that, and we did literally own the place. Anya suggested it would be a good idea to add a coffee shop to our assets, diversify them a bit. We pretty much owned the nightlife of the city, why not start to claim the day as well. 

I was actually very impressed with what Anya did with the place. It really did have a soothing effect, like a brisk of nature downtown. It was doing very well since its opening and if it stayed on this path, which I had no doubt it would, our investment would pay itself in a matter of a few months. 

The blonde finally wrapped up her things and she was turning around to leave, quite hastily if you ask me. She was bound to see me and I hated how my stomach clenched in anticipation of her gaze falling on mine.

I noticed the barista coming in my peripheral vision and saw the collision before it happened. 

I must say I was very impressed that neither of them spilled not even a drop from their respective drink. The blonde was all over the door though, her drink held in the air in a comical way. I had to set my jaw to hold back a chuckle. I expected her to mutter a quick apology and run head down for her dignity without looking back. I had been haunted by blue eyes for four days, now was my chance to look back into them again. But still, I didn’t move. She was going to get away and I would just have to settle with a sight and a deep feeling of disappointment in my stomach. But that was not out of pride.

 _Love is weakness_.

But she didn’t run away like I expected her to. After making sure her drink was safe, she picked up her bag and opened her mouth when her eyes landed on me.

Well, now she knew.

 

*

 

**[Clarke:]**

Now I really wished I would have just listened to stupid Raven when she called the "hot babe at twelve o’clock", that would have saved me from this endless embarrassment. I was acutely aware that I was just staring, mouth slightly opened, but still, my body wouldn’t respond to my command.

“Oh my! Are you okay?”

Thank God the barista, she got me out of my trance.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t check where I was going. I’m fine, are you?”

I already knew she was, she somehow managed to stay on her feet _without_ spilling her drink. Damn, she was impressive.

“I’m okay. What are the odds that we didn’t spill anything?” She smiled.

“They were pretty slim, considering my natural lack of grace. I guess it was all you.”

Oh God, was I flirting?

The barista smiled shyly, then put down the cup in front of… Lexa. Of course.

“Next one will be on me.” She told me.

She then left with her head down, hiding a slight blush on her cheeks.

Lexa, on the other hand, was straight serious, but the way her jaw was set and the intensity of her gaze slightly gave her away. She was stunningly terrifying. The woman she was with was as stoic as her, but a corner of her mouth was slightly up in a smirk.

I tried to regain my composure before the will of digging my own grave became too strong. Sure, I had just made a fool out of myself for everyone to see, but the way Lexa was glaring after my flirtatious interaction with the barista was just too much of a thrill for me to handle in a better way.

_She was jealous._

Boy, was I willing to play with her.

“I’m sorry you both had to see that. Enjoy the rest of your day.”

Then I turned around, pretending not to recognise her. I had barely taken two steps outside when I felt someone grab my arm and turn me around. I couldn’t hold back a smirk when I stared into two fiery green eyes.

“What are you doing?” She hissed.

“I don’t know.” I said coyly. “What am I doing?”

 _What_ was I doing?

“Why did you pretend you didn’t know me?”

“I wanted to see if you would follow me.” 

I should have just slapped myself. _Great play Clarke_.

A look of confusion and curiosity went through her eyes and her stance seemed to soften ever so slightly. I was surprised at how much attention I gave to every little move she was making. I could read her body language as if it was my own. 

“You want me to chase you.”

“Maybe.”

God did it feel good to flirt with her.

But some things were infinitely more pressing and I had sworn to myself I would get some answers.

“Lexa, I know you don’t owe me anything, actually, I am the one in debt, but I want to know what was going on there.”

Her expression went back to stoic and empty as usual. 

“It’s a dangerous place, Clarke. You must never go back.” 

“I already know that, I could have lost my life if it weren’t for you. I don’t know how I will ever make up for it, but I need to know why it almost happened in the first place.”

My tone was firm, borderline aggressive. Far from where we were seconds ago. Her chin went slightly up as she was contemplating what to say next.

“You told me you were given the wrong address. Explain.”

I knew she would answer my question if I gave her the right one.

“I’m doing a project on MountWeather Pharmarceuticals for school. I was supposed to have an interview Dr. Tsing and her assistant gave me the facility’s address. I received an email from Dr. Tsing 15 minutes after the time we were supposed to meet and long story short, she insisted that they are not affiliated with it anymore. To be honest, it doesn’t look right.” 

I could feel her gaze piercing through my soul, looking for a lie or for a reason to doubt my word. I firmly stood my ground under her appraisal, looking straight back into her eyes without blinking.

“I suppose it’s only fair that you know what almost cost you your life.”

I tried to contain my relief as much as I could.

“But this is not the place nor the time to do it. Meet me back here at ten tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there's no quite much action yet, I just need to make sure to put everything into place first. Next chapter will be more about MWP and their illegal experimentation, as Clarke will get answers from Lexa.
> 
> I promise there will be more action in the future after everything is set in place.
> 
> Don't hesitate if you have any objections/problems/comments/approvals :)


	4. Chapter 4

**[Clarke:]**

“I should have fought for you.”

“Finn, don’t.”

“Clarke, I love you.”

I saw his confession coming before it left his lips. I felt my heart rip at the words, a mixed feeling of ecstasy and pain flowing out of it. I wanted him to love me. Just not like that. Not after finding out I was the girl he cheated on. Not after finding out it was Raven.

“I’m in love with you.”

I still couldn’t bring myself to say something. I looked down, feeling the tears run down my face. After the initial shock, I muffled a sob. I knew by heart what I would say next.

_You broke my heart. I’m sorry, I just can’t_.

“I love you too Finn."

That’s when I woke up. Tears still running down my cheeks, still breathless from what just happened.

_What the hell?_

Since when did I say that? It was a recurrent dream (or nightmare) I’ve had ever since I ended things with Finn and ever since, I had barely come out from it in one piece. Raven and I somehow managed to become best friend after him. I guess the whole _chicks before dicks_ really applied here and it really was the silver lining that saved us both. I knew she was over him, if the way she was obsessing with everyone was anything to tell, but before my stranger with green eyes, I had never fully gotten over him.

He really did mess me up.

I knew I was allowed to grieve and move on in my own terms, I knew everyone did it differently. But that didn’t stop Raven from commenting on how this “loathsome ignorant asshat and masturbatory bug-eyed small-minded piece of crap who has delusions of adequacy” didn’t deserve our heartache (that had been one of Raven’s best insult during one of her multiple rants and it did lighten up my mood). She also insisted on multiple occasions that I should “move one already and get some ass”. Classic Raven.

I did love Finn at some point and I did hope that he loved me back. That had all been true, but I still couldn’t get over what he did and what he made me do, no matter how much he loved me. This is not how I wanted to start a relationship. Not based on a lie, not even if his feelings were genuinely real. I didn’t think any amount of authenticity could wash away a lie as big as a four months cheating game. 

Now, this gorgeous beautiful woman had entered in my life without a warning while I was still drowning in my ocean of confused feelings. Sure, I had been obsessing over her (ok, over her body) and maybe I was more ready to move on than I originally thought I was. At least, on a physical level, because I would be lying my ass off if I said she never crossed my mind in the shower.

_Damn it Raven._

And now, my recurrent dream/nightmare of Finn’s love confession had taken a turn: I said I loved him back instead of shutting him out.

What did that mean?

 

*

 

I didn’t know if I was supposed to change for my meeting with Lexa and Raven had been absolutely no help.

Because it was a meeting, wasn’t it?

“Yeah yeah sure, you’re gonna talk, but you’re also gonna fuck after.”

“Raven!” I screamed, scandalised.

“What? You want to jump her bones and she wants to do the same. That’s how a date works baby. And, sometimes, you don’t even have to talk at all.”

“It’s not a date.”

“Fine, it just makes the whole fucking-thing hotter if it’s strictly business, if you see what I mean.”

God she was impossible. That’s probably why I loved her so much. 

“I’m not going to change, she’ll think I put efforts into this… and this being nothing.” I added when I saw her mouth open. 

She held up her hands in the air in surrender.

“Aye, if that’s what you want to think. But I know you, Griffin, even you can’t resist an ass like hers.” 

“For Godsake’s Raven, do you ever not talk about people like that?”

“Well, since you have to involve God in our discussion, I will have you know that I speak nothing more than the truth, and you know it. It might be a crude one, but I am not lying in the face of God!” 

With that, she threw her head back and stretched out her arms on both sides of her, as if she was having some epiphany or something. She was so dramatic.

“Asshole.”

I couldn’t help but leave with a big smile plastered all over my face.

And with words that wouldn’t leave my mind. _But you’re also gonna fuck after_.

I had to take a deep breath. _Fuck you Raven_.

 

*

 

Damn she was fine.

Everytime I saw her, I was reminded of how stunning she was. Either she got more and more beautiful with time or I simply forgot her beauty everytime she wasn’t in my sight.

I secretly thanked myself for not changing when I saw her in the same clothes I’ve seen her earlier that day. Same loose satin white shirt tucked in high waist jean shorts. Hair waved down over one side, same killing enchanting eyes. Same enticing plump lips I wished I could take my eyes off.

She was going to be the death of me.

We went for a drive and I must say I was a little taken aback when she took me to a black pick up. Not that I thought it was a strictly a man’s truck, far from it, I guess I just didn’t expect her with this choice of car. Then again, I remembered her at the facility. She was as a classy woman as a badass warrior.

So much more enticing. But I guess that’s all beside the point.

The silence between us was a bit awkward. I didn’t really know what to do with myself, I was as uptight as a stick. She was making me nervous.

She told me we would talk about it once we arrived wherever we were supposed to go. I still had no clue where we were headed. 

She finally pulled up in the middle of nowhere.

“Is this where I make the least original joke and ask if you’re going to kill me?”

I tried to pass it as casual, but I don’t think I succeeded. When I looked at her, I thought I could see a ghost of a smile on her lips. That sent shivers down the back of my neck.

“Death is not the end, Clarke.”

And with that cryptic answer, she got out of the truck leaving me confused. I followed suit and saw her busying herself in the tail of the truck.

“Well, the only thing I can think of where death is not the end is ‘the little death’…”

Not even a minute into the conversation and I already managed to talk about sex. This must be a record of some sort. I could almost feel my hand burning from Raven’s distant high five.

“Well, I was talking about the Walkers, but, wherever your mind takes you, Clarke.”

This time, I saw her smirk.

This time, I could also have burst into flames from my embarrassment. I considered never speaking again in my life, at least not to her.

 

When she was finally done, I saw there were pillows and blankets covering the box of the truck, along with a speaker.

_What was that?_

“Are you trying to seduce me?”

I just couldn’t help myself. She held her hand out to me so I could step into the truck.

“I understand it looks like it, but this could take a while and I wanted us to be both comfortable and away from any potential eavesdroppers.” 

I admit I felt a small cringe of disappointment. But it also made me realize that I absolutely had to regain my composure around her. I had to be myself again, confident, natural with a head on my shoulders: I knew I was stronger than that and had infinitely more to offer. I wanted her, needed her, to take me seriously. So I sat down, took a discrete breath and leaned casually against the back of the truck.

“Alright then. Time for answers.”

 

*

 

**[Lexa:]**

Talking about the Walkers to Clarke had definitely been easier than what I originally thought it would. I had been reluctant to talk about it with anyone outside the Coalition, I had even been firmly opposed since the Walkers were classified as confidential information, but I found myself unable to hide anything from Clarke. 

She was right: she could have lost her life to them. She deserved to know.

But before I told her what they were all about, I had her swear that this conversation would never leave the truck. 

Although, in all honesty, I could only see it going one way: she was going to think I was delusional and making stuff up, because really, zombies? There had to be another explanation, some sort of medical sickness that was yet to be identified. This could not be real.

But sure enough, she went against all odds: she didn’t scoff or burst into laughter like I expected her to (but maybe, that was for later). At least for now, she had managed to go against my expectation twice this day. Maybe I really should give her more credit. Have faith in her.

When I was done talking about what they were, how contagious and dangerous, and how to kill them, she stared at me, face unreadable.

“MountWeather Pharmaceuticals are responsible for that, aren’t they? That’s why you agreed to talk about it.”

It took me a while before I finally nodded.

“How?”

Her tone was inquisitive. Much more confident than anything I had witnessed from her yet. I craved for more…

“As you know, MountWeather Pharmaceutical specializes in blood research and immune treatment, that’s why they’re so big in vaccines development. They’ve been working for quite some time on a new project, which is part of their research program. It’s an experimental treatment aimed at treating leukemia in a much more efficient way that what we presently have.  It seems they had this new lead for a cure, but turns out a new virus came out of it. I am not able to accurately tell you how that happened, but it did. Now they won’t stop, I am not entirely sure why and it worries me.”

“How do you know all of this?”

“I once made a deal with Dante Wallace, MountWeather’s ex-CEO and president. It was a few years ago, when I was quite new to my current role and his company was in the red. We came to an agreement where I supplied him with enough liquidity to put them back on their feet and, as a typical shareholder, I was due information on how the company was doing. But the numbers weren’t enough for me. I needed to know more: what they were working on, how they were leading their research, everything. That was a problem for Cage Wallace, Dante’s son and vice-president. He knew they didn’t have an ethical practice in some areas of their research and he was afraid that I would find out. He somehow managed to take his father’s place and he forced me out of the company.”

“You could probably sue them and easily win.” 

A dark glint clouded my eyes at her words and I know she saw it. It was predatory. 

“I could. But I don’t want to just sue them and get the money they owe me. I want to take them down personally. I want to expose them and end them with my own hands.”

Something told me she was inspired by my will for a second. Maybe it was the way she looked up at me, maybe it was the small opening of her mouth as she drank all of my words.

“I have a reputation to uphold, Clarke. You don’t make decisions for me and not expect payback.”

“And how does that go?”

Seeing her bewitched by my subtle power play made me want to lose control but I was too far gone to consider it seriously.

I _was_ furious at MountWeather. They would pay, not only for crossing me, but for all the lives they took. She saw the spark in my eyes when I fiercely landed my gaze back on hers.

“With fire and blood.”

 

*

 

“Is there a treatment for the Walkers?”

The moment had passed after a lingering silence, filled with charged tension. But neither one of us acted on it, I guess we subconsciously knew better.

“Not that I know of. That’s why we sometimes go to the facility and kill them by hand.”

“But you have your suspicions about why he’s not stopping.”

It may have started as a question, but it certainly didn’t feel like one. Her inquisitive tone was back.

“Yes.” I simply said.

“What is it?”

“You wouldn’t believe me.”

I probably shouldn’t have said that. She had already proven to me she did, and she was not going back. But my instincts got the best of me and the words left my mouth before I could stop them.

“Lexa, I admit I would have thought you were crazy or on some crazy shit high if we met under other circumstances. But I saw them, Lexa, I saw the Walkers. I also saw you armed from head to toe, I know you weren’t just some lunatic in a questionable state. I knew you knew what was going on and what we were facing. What you say now adds up and I had this sick feeling in my stomach when I saw how much Dr. Tsing insisted on the facility not being affiliated to them anymore. I believe you Lexa. What do I have to do or say to make you believe me in return?” 

She had grown even more fierce and she was just beautiful. I knew she was right. I wanted to tell her what I felt the first time I saw her hanging for her life in the elevator. How this encounter changed my life, how she held a power over it that scared the shit out of me, but how it also made me feel alive in a way I thought was lost forever.

“Clarke…” 

I lost myself in the moonlight reflecting in the blue of her eyes. My whole demeanor had bent in front of her. I was terrified and my mind reeled in the feeling.

“I believe you.”

I barely breathed the words, but I know she heard it.

“Then tell me.”

I don’t know how she went from fierce to soft in a matter of seconds. I was even more surprised to find myself reacting maybe even more to her gentleness.

“I think he wants to raise an army.”

I probably lost her then.

“B-but… why?”

“I’m still not sure. But I think he’ll stay in the dark until he finds a permanent treatment against it.” 

“He wants to play God.”

I looked at her questionably. Once again, she overcame my expectations.

“Maybe he wants to maintain the illusion he has control over death. And once he finds a treatment, that he’s over it. If you think about it, the virus is a kind of death. So he takes credit for having some “deadly power” _and_ for being over it. That’s some God complex.”

I gently scoffed, not in a mocking way.

“That would also send everyone to overdrive in panic. Money and power are surely the end goal to all of this.”

She scoffed, lost a second in her thoughts before she turned to me: “What else is new with petty boys?” 

I smiled at her. For the first time, I couldn’t help it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song from the beginning: "The Night We Met (feat. Phoebe Bridgers)", Lord Huron.

**[Lexa:]**

_When the night was full of terrors_

_And your eyes were filled with tears_

_When you had not touched me yet_

_Oh, take me back to the night we met_

I sat beside her, perfectly still as she was listening to the song, gently moving her head back and forth. Under the moonlight, Lord Huron’s voice transported us where time and space were frozen. I admit: it was borderline disgustingly cheesy-romantic.

…Fine. Yes, I liked it. A lot.

And yes, I wanted her.

I mean, I wanted her all the time, but now it was particularly painful to keep my hands to myself.

I knew she wanted me too, but I got the feeling something was off. She struck me as the type who went for that they wanted and got it. I was certain that she felt our attraction as much as I did, so I was wondering what was holding her back. 

Little did I know I was going to find out soon.

Like, right away.

“Do you think it’s possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time?” 

Her tone was contemplative, her eyes lost out there.

So that was it? Did she already have someone in her life?

“I guess some people believe in it, yes. With the open relationship and all.”

She softly hummed. I knew she wanted more.

“But you what do you think?”

Truth is, I didn’t know. I didn’t know if I would have been this attracted to Clarke if Costia was still around when I met her and I didn’t want to think about it. It hurt too much. I took in a deep breath, trying to put words on my thoughts.

“I think sometimes we feel things that words can’t accurately pinpoint, whether the feeling is close to our conception of love or any other feelings that we put a name on.”

I paused at that moment, trying to figure out where I was going with this.

“I guess I also think we have different levels of feeling. Like the intensity of the feeling, if you will. Take friendship for example.”

“Yeah, I guess I understand what you mean.”

Whether my answer satisfied her or not, I didn’t know. She didn’t tell me, she was still lost in her thoughts.

Then, just like that, she snapped out of her trance. She shifted slightly and looked at me, her eyes hungry for answers yet again. For a different subject, that is.

“You mentioned a ‘current role’ earlier. What is it that you do?" 

“I have a company. My associate and I own several nightclubs and we recently came up with Grounders.”

Her eyes widened with surprise and I saw her mouth a curse a soft “holy shit”. It took everything I had to not let my inner douchebag smirk.

“And what about your… Walker-killer outfit? I mean, I understand what you were doing, I’m just wondering how you came up with the training and all.”

I was debating on whether I should tell her about the Coalition and my underground activities or not, when I was saved by the bell.

A dark silhouette appeared from afar. I sensed Clarke’s panic beside me. I put a calming hand on her forearm.

“It’s okay. He’s with me.”

 

*

 

It must have been a matter of life or death if Gustus had showed up, interrupting my time with Clarke. He knew I was not to be disturbed on times like this.

I excused myself to Clarke and met up with him a few steps from the truck: far enough so we could whisper without being heard, but close enough so Clarke would still feel at a safe distance with me.

“What is it?” I said, half annoyed, half relieved by his interruption even though I didn’t want to admit it. 

“News from MountWeather, _Heda_.”

He gave me the time to process. I nodded him to continue.

“They’re hiring. Personal assistant for Dr. Tsing.”

I gasped.

“What happened to the other?”

“Officially, she decided to dedicate herself to the third-world countries. But in truth, she’s off the map, disappeared.”

“Walker.” I whispered, genuinely sorry for the girl. I couldn’t believe how people could turn on their own so easily.

I understood very well treason and how to deal with it. I didn’t shy from inflincting pain, sometimes torture, but this, turning someone into a Walker voluntarily… it just turned my stomach upside down.

But I couldn’t dwell in sorrow if I wanted to bring justice to her and all the other victims. This truly was an opportunity we couldn’t afford to miss. Unfortunately, with the thorough background check the MountWeather made on every application, I knew any member of the Coalition wouldn’t stand a chance. And to be honest, I didn’t trust anyone else.

Still, I had to act now. Fast. 

“Thank you Gustus.” I dismissed him.

He inclined his head politely before leaving.

 

*

 

**[Clarke:]**

I hadn’t seen nor heard of Lexa for the past week.

I guess I shouldn’t have expected to hear from her anyway, we didn’t really say anything about seeing each other again. We didn’t exchange numbers, we didn’t make any promises.

I guess I really wished we would have.

I don’t know what the man had told her, but when she dropped me off the other night, she seemed preoccupied. Her whole being exuded her natural confidence as always, but the ever slightly pout of her mouth and mostly the look in her eyes made my heart itch with concern. I knew she was troubled by something, I just wished I could have helped her. But I didn’t push her, I knew she would have literally pushed me away.

Now I found myself distracted and worried for something and someone I didn’t know.

A very pretty someone. But not the point.

I thanked Heaven that the term was one paper away from the end. I basically had the MountWeather research paper to finish and _I was done_. God I couldn’t wait for it to be done.

Dr. Tsing had gracefully rescheduled our meeting and to say she was impressed by my questions would be an understatement (although, I’m not sure why because they were pretty standard). Maybe she just liked my vibe, I don’t know what it was, but she offered me a job on the spot. She told me her assistant had a change of heart and went off to help the unfortunates. I guess it kind of struck me as a warning sign, but I knew that it was probably worth the risk. I knew I couldn’t have asked for a better opportunity to legitimately be inside MountWeather and the idea of being a spy felt like my little girl’s biggest dream came true.

And yes, I knew it would give me a reason to be closer to Lexa. And yes, again, I craved it. I will not admit that it was the main reason I decided to accept the position.

But I will also not deny it. 

I had two weeks before I officially started as Dr. Tsing assistant. Two weeks to finish my paper and be done with school for the summer. I went to Grounders everyday since my meeting with her, hoping to bump into Lexa. I had no such luck, but I found out that I was actually very productive whenever I worked there. Also, Raven had decided to take a plunge and apply as a barista. She was hired, meaning I had my coffee at a generous discount here and there. So that’s how I found myself spending a lot of time happily immersed in Grounders’ quiet atmosphere. 

I was on the other side of the street from the coffee shop waiting for the light to turn green, when I saw _her_ coming out of it and heading in the opposite direction, coffee in hand. My heart skipped a beat and I felt the excitement rushing through my veins.

She wore a white satin blouse tucked in high waist skinny black dress pants. She was draped in a light grey open trench coat and I caught a glimpse of a black leather watch. A black leather brief case hung on her side from her shoulder and she was striding quickly despite her heels. Her demeanour combined with her flawless style was just too much to take. 

God she was breathtaking.

I didn’t even need a second before going against my better judgement. I walked past Grounders, following her at a safe distance, my heart pounding in my chest. I stopped and watched as she went in Into the Woods club. I guess she owned it too. Her associate and her really seemed to have something for the earth theme.

My rational self was finally getting back to me as I was getting down from the high of my chase when I was suddenly grabbed and all I could see was darkness.

 

*

 

I was brought to my knees before the bag was taken off my head. I was surrounded by a heavy crowd, almost all big bulky men, everyone harboring heavy tattoos getting agitated around me. I knew who they were. They were Trikru, commonly known as the Hunters. They were one of the fiercest twelve gangs that were prowling in the city’s underground “activites”. They were scaring the shit out of me.

But an even more scary realisation froze every ounce of blood in my body:

 _Into the Woods, Grounders, Trikru_ … Could Lexa be related to them…?

“What is the meaning of this?”

A deep strong voice hovered all the others. The tallest blukiest man I’ve ever seen made his way through the crowd towards me. He had dark hair braided in an intricate pattern that bombed at the top of his head and went down to the middle of his back. The sides of his head were shaved and tattoos started on the sides of his faces where his sideburns ended. I’ve never seen a goatee look so intimidating in my life. He looked somehow familiar, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

“A spy!” someone shouted. The others followed suit, words being thrown in the air.

“Traitor! Death to her! Guilty!”

I was so shocked I couldn’t even form the words to defend myself. I was so terrified I barely stood on my feet, my whole body shaking. Goatee-man looked down at me, narrowing his eyes. _Where did I know him from?_

It’s when he seized me by the back of my neck that I finally found control over my body. Or rather, my instincts took over. I abruptly ducked down, taking him by surprise then tried to force my way out where I spotted a door.

I knew it was useless, but I was desperate to try. At least, I would die trying to escape.

In the commotion I started, I felt hands grab my body from all the sides and I heard my voice mixing in with the shouts of the gang.

“Let her pass.”

The words splashed over me like cold water.

The voice was low like a growl, but so distinctly authoritative it didn’t need to be louder for the room to go quiet in a matter of seconds.

The hands let go of me and suddenly, I had space to breathe again.

A path had been made in front of me, leading my eyes into the piercing green I had craved to find again.


	6. Chapter 6

**[Lexa:]**

“Do you think the girl knows?”

“No.” I answered sincerely.

“But she followed you here, _Heda_.”

“It doesn’t mean that she knows.”

If I knew deep down she didn’t, a part of me still couldn’t help itself doubting her motives and my advisors were not help.

“You really think Clarke knows Lexa is the Commander?”

As usual, Anya’s tone didn’t convey any emotion, although it remained intimidating. I saw Gustus shift uncomfortably under her gaze.

“Yes.” It seems Titus went to his rescue. “She’s having contact with MountWeather, she could have been sent to spy on her for all we know.”

“Why would they do that? They’re not interested in taking over our business.”

Anya and Titus were gone once again for their usual bickering debacle. In all fairness, this one was far more relevant and I was happy Anya led the interrogation about Titus and Gustus’ doubts.

“Maybe not them, but we know who they replaced _Heda_ with.”

“You really think the Cold Ones would be behind it?”

“We all know Nia’s desire to take over the Coalition and your business. We know they struck a deal. Maybe this could be what Nia is getting from MountWeather.”

I understood how it could look bad for Clarke. For starters, no coincidence but fate could explain how we ended up both at the same time at the facility, then we bumped into each other at Grounders and now she followed me, all of our interactions happening only a few days apart.

But they didn’t know the instant connection we shared when our eyes first met. They couldn’t read her eyes like I did, they didn’t attempt to read the sincerity behind the blue of her irises.

No, because for us, love is weakness.

Still, she didn’t know I was the Commander. She didn’t even know I was Trikru.

“She should be monitored at all times.” Gustus finally said after a moment of silence.

Anya looked at me, I knew she had her own suspicions and ultimately agreed with him.

Before I could answer, we heard hectic noise coming from upstairs. As soon as I looked over at Gustus, he got up from his chair and left. When it didn’t seem like it was going to settle down anytime soon, I got up and went to see for myself.

I was so shocked to see Clarke being shoved all around, it took everything I had not to dive in myself and strangle every single one of these bastards who laid hands on her. When I spoke, I remained as stoic as ever, staring them all down, knowing that this was far more effective than the physical beating. They’ve never seen an ounce of my outrage (unless in a combat) and my calm temper scared them that much because if they knew how to deal with violent physical reactions, they didn’t know how to handle a death stare. I had them all in the palm of my hand, at the mercy of my eyes.

They had created a pathway between Clarke and me as soon as I had spoken.

_What in the world was she doing here?_

I guess now she knew I was Trikru.

 

*

 

**[Clarke:]**

The room was dark, lit by light bulbs that did as much as fire torches. It was intimidating, especially with everyone staring at me. Lexa sat at the head of a large wooden table with the woman Raven hit on at Grounders standing on her right. Hands behind her back, her stare was unreadable, but she scared the shit out of me just like she did then. On Lexa’s left stood a tall bald man and Goatee-man who were both glaring at me. When I looked back at Lexa, her eyes were empty. 

Nobody said anything for a while. Instead of making me nervous as it should have, it started to piss me off.

“Will someone tell me what the fuck is all of this?”

I let myself in an outburst because somehow, I knew Lexa would make sure no harm came to me. It didn’t make sense, especially now that I knew she was involved with Trikru, but I felt safe with her.

Goatee-man angrily moved towards me and I honest to God don’t know where I took the strength to stand my ground and just look back at him.

“Gustus.” 

Lexa’s voice stopped him in place. He narrowed his eyes at me. 

“Talk to her like that again and I will slit your throat.” He growled at me.

I conveyed all the confidence I could gather in my eyes, not willing to leave his for a second. I knew under my confident pretense, my knees wanted nothing but to let me drop on the ground.

“Gustus, that’s enough. _Behave_.”

_Holy shit._ Did Lexa just speak Trigedasleng?

That meant she was not just somehow involved or related with Trikru: it meant she _was_ Trikru. And judging by the authority she had on everyone up at the club and on Goatee-man, a very powerful one.

_God, that was hot_. Especially with the regal way she was sitting at the head of the table, I admit that did all kind of things to me. I had to clench my jaw and internally slap myself to bring me back to reality. 

I gathered that Goatee-man’s name was Gustus. He backed down, but his eyes were still throwing daggers at me. Bald man stepped up.

“What do you have to say for yourself?”

I frowned in slight confusion. Was he accusing me of something?

I looked at Lexa, but her face was as emotionless as usual and this time, her body language didn’t give anything away. She was still like a marble statue, I’ve never seen her like this. At this moment, all lust I felt in my body was swiped with concern: it scared me to think that there was maybe a part of her that was as empty as her eyes were at that moment. Not only empty of all emotion, but empty of Lexa. If that made any sense.

 

I looked back at Bald man and spoke my words with ferocity.

“What are you accusing me of, exactly?”

“Do you know what we do to spies?”

_What the fuck?_  

I looked around, hoping to find for some kind of hint. Raven’s crush was as unreadable as ever, Gustus looked like he was clouded by his hatred for me and Lexa remained stoic. She looked guarded, but also… curious?

I tried to think here for a second: Bald man sure seemed to think I was a spy and if Gustus didn’t think so, he sure thought I was an enemy. If Lexa didn’t think as though, she didn’t do anything to stop Bald man in his interrogation. After all, I did follow her so I guess she had the right to expect some answers from me.

I wasn’t sure though which gang Bald man thought had sent me to spy over Trikru. But at this point, I was pretty sure there was nothing I could say to make him believe I wasn’t actually a spy so instead of working on my defense, I took another venue:

“I was hoping to speak with Lexa because I have an urgent matter to discuss with her regarding MountWeather.”

Both of the men gasped. Gustus looked a second away from imploding, all muscles in his body flexed to the point of breaking. Bald man looked triumphant (I had no clue as to why) and I swear I saw a glimpse of curiosity pass over Raven’s crush’s eyes. If her face hadn’t moved an inch, Lexa’s eyes didn’t hide their interest.

Bald man stepped towards me and his face leaned dangerously close to mine.

“You’re done here, Mountain-girl.” He spat through gritted teeth.

I say again: _what the fuck?_ Mountain-girl?

“MountWeather did not send me, if that’s what you’re implying.” I said, fiercely staring back into his eyes. “Nor any of the other gangs you’re at war with.”

His eyes narrowed at me but I saw the slight surprise and confusion.

“Like I said, I’m here to speak with Lexa. Not with you.” I hope my tone was firm enough to let him know I wasn’t interested in arguing any further.

It was clear Lexa was entertained, or at least slightly amused. The woman on her right hadn’t moved a bit, but something told me she was having her fair share of fun too.

“Lies!” Bald man suddenly shouted turning towards Lexa. “She’s trying to make us believe she doesn’t know anything!” He turned to me again, fury in his eyes. “I know you know who she is!” He snarled pointing to Lexa.

I couldn’t do much but look confused. 

“Choose your next words carefully, Mountain-girl.” Gustus growled, one hand over the dagger resting on his hip. 

“I already told you I’m not from MountWeather.” I snapped at him. “And as for Lexa, all I know is that she owns several nightclubs and Grounders, and she’s apparently Trikru, which I didn’t know before now, but since you won’t believe me anyway, what’s the point.”

They were seriously starting to piss me off. All of them. The men with their ridiculous accusations and the women with their impossible silence.

“I’m also not from any other gang, so if that’s also what you’re accusing me of on top of everything else, you can just drop it. I’m not fucking interested in spying on any gang who fights for territory or whatever the fuck it is you’re fighting about like a bunch of primitive Neanderthals!”

I saw Bald man open his mouth, but before he could say anything, I stepped forward, burning my eyes into his.

“I am done talking to you.” I growled. 

His mouth opened again, but Lexa finally took pity on me.

“That’s enough, Titus.” 

I thoroughly enjoyed the fury in his eyes, his heavy breathing and his lips clenched in a straight line.

“Leave us.”

Lexa’s words were final. They all walked out of the room, Raven’s crush glancing at me with interest. As small and possibly meaningless as it was, I tricked myself into thinking that at l at least won her over.

 

*

 

When we were left alone, Lexa stood and walked around the table to lean on it, facing me. Her eyes pierced into mine, like they always did. She brought her hands together, resting on her front and slightly lifted her chin up before speaking.

“I apologize on behalf on Titus, Clarke. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but he means well.” 

I couldn’t hold back a scoff.

“His job is to protect me, as well as Gustus’. They can be… quite aggressive in doing so.”

“You don’t say.”

I saw a corner of her mouth lift up a little in an apology.

“What did he mean, when he said I knew who you were?”

I couldn’t help but know. She was surrounded by this mysterious aura and I couldn’t get enough. As much as it scared me to admit it, I was addicted to her.

I wanted her. All of her.

“Have you ever heard of “the Coalition”, Clarke?”

I had heard about it in the past, but didn’t pay much attention to it since it regarded the underground activities of the city.

“I’ve heard it’s some kind of alliance between the twelve gangs in an attempt to share the city and to stop the wars between them. But as far as I know, it’s just an urban legend, I mean, what’s the point of forming a gang if you don’t have anyone left to fight, right?”

I let out a nervous laugh. What was I talking about? The next words flew my mouth before I could stop myself.

“I also don’t believe in the mythic figure of the Commander who would be powerful enough to create such an alliance and lead it.”

She stared at me for a while, seemingly unimpressed by my “knowledge”. Her stare was severe and it was making me nervous. When I finally couldn’t take it anymore, I looked down at my feet, tracing small patterns on the ground. 

“It seems you have an opinion of your own that clouds your judgement, Clarke.” She finally spoke. 

It sounded like a rebuke, but it didn’t feel like an insult. She got off from the table and slowly stepped toward me until we were inches close. I could feel all of her power in our proximity it made my breath get caught in my throat. She spoke her next words carefully, her voice deep, low and authoritative. Terrifying. 

I was petrified and it felt exhilarating.

“The Coalition _is_ real, Clarke. And I’m the one who formed it.”

I looked up at her in disbelief, my mouth hanging open.

_Was she…_  

“I am the Commander.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I am the Commander." Drop the mic.


	7. Chapter 7

**[Lexa:]**

I would lie if I said her words didn’t sting a bit.

I understood where they can from, the gangs were not nice by the any definition of the term, but we weren’t just some primitive animals either.

Still, I saw through her judgement: she knew deep down she could be mistaken. She was opened to the idea that maybe, just maybe, Trikru was more than a brutal and ruthless bunch of criminals.

I saw her crumble under my gaze, her foot tracing small patterns on the ground.

“It seems you have an opinion of your own that clouds your judgement, Clarke.”

I didn’t mean to be condescending, I just wanted her to be aware she entertained stereotypes towards us and I wanted her to give me a chance to show her we were more than that.

Besides, I had genuinely been impressed by the strong will and confidence she showed during her fight with Titus. The way she didn’t shy from being firm and from holding her ground, the way she snapped at Gustus. The more worked up she got, the fearless she was. Her eyes were burning like fire, her voice going down into a growl by the end of it.

I’d been bewitched by her force, by her beauty. By her.

Whether she knew it or not, I knew she was powerful. She had it in her.

She was born to be a leader, just like me.

And that was a beautiful thing. It made me _feel_ something.

But for later with these contemplations. Right now, I had to show her who I really was. I needed her to take me in in all my power. I desired to see her tremble before me in need.

Besides, she apparently had something to tell me about MountWeather.

I moved from the table and walked purposely slow towards her, straight as ever, letting the Commander exude nothing but grace, confidence and power. I saw her breath get caught in her throat and that only spurred me on. I spoke with my voice low, intimidating, predatory.

“The Coalition _is_ real, Clarke. And I’m the one who formed it.”

She looked up at me in disbelief, her mouth hanging open. I saw her understanding the implication of my words. I towered over her, staring fiercely into her eyes and I knew at that moment mine were enough to chain her to the ground.

“I am the Commander.”

 

*

 

I thoroughly enjoyed every drop of power being the Commander brought me. I was used to people staring at me, but when they dared look at the Commander, their reaction was empowering: they trembled either in fear or in awe.

My people truly believed in me and for that, I swore to lead them to greatness with dignity and grace. I gave them every part of me as much as they gave every part of themselves to me. I could look any of my soldiers in the eye and tell them to go die for me, and they would do it in the blink of an eye. If I loved the power, I loved my people even more. Their best interest was behind every decision I made.

Then, Clarke happened. She stumbled into my life and opened a gate I thought I sealed a long time ago.

And now, she was looking at me in a mix of awe and fear, admiration and excitement. _And hunger_.

I felt the familiar urge to take her against the table as hard as I could. After all, I was also in a constant state of hunger whenever in her presence, there was no use denying it. I was hungry for her body, hungry for her sounds, hungry for her release.

And then, the odd feeling of wanting to lay with her creeped inside my head. To hold her close so she could feel my heartbeat.

I dismissed the feeling quickly enough, willing to push it away and ignore it as long as I could.

_To be Commander is to be alone._

I tried to go against it once, but it killed a part of me. I don’t know if I would be able to survive it again. 

“Titus thought you knew I was the Commander. He thought you were sent by MountWeather to spy on me, not by any other gang: they’re already all under my command.”

I returned to the table, leaning against it once again. I spoke the next words softly as I reminisced about past memories.

“A gang most often starts out as a family. It’s family first, not necessarily bonded by blood, but by something greater. Then, depending on the leader, it can either lead to something good, or go down in flames. Unfortunately, the world is a ruthless place and sometimes, to lead well, you must make hard choices.”

She only blinked at my implication. Maybe she understood, maybe she didn’t, either way, she didn’t judge me. She didn’t see me as a blameworthy criminal even though I was at the head of the largest gang alliance.

And it somehow brought solace to my heart.

 

*

 

**[Clarke:]**

Once again, they were all back in the room: Titus, Gustus and Raven’s crush, who I learned was called Anya. They had resumed their position besides Lexa, but this time, Titus and Anya were sitting with her. Gustus remained on his feet, watching me closely as I stood facing them from the other side of the table.

We were all waiting for Lexa to speak first.

“Clarke has come up with a plan to infiltrate MountWeather. She wants to share it with all of us.”

They all stared at me intently.

“I have been offered a job as Dr. Tsing’s personal assistant. I interviewed her for a school project and she seemed to like me enough to offer me the job.”

“How can we be sure you’re telling the truth?”

 _Fucking_ Titus. His stubborn ass was really pissing off.

“I said it’s _enough_ , Titus.” Lexa growled. “You won’t doubt her word anymore and you will respect her because I tell you to.”

Okay, I was willing to endure his stubborn ass if that meant I got to see Lexa shut him up again. She hadn’t even spared a look at him, her eyes never leaving mine the entire time. I turned a corner of my mouth up to quickly thank her, and she nodded for me to continue.

Still, as one of Lexa’s close advisor (I assumed he was), I wanted to get in his good grace or at least, convince him of my good intentions.

 “I understand you still doubt me, Titus, I have yet to prove myself to all of you. So, with that in mind, I am willing to do whatever it takes to make you believe I am on your side.”

I felt Lexa’s approval at my words in the small tilt of her head.

“I am willing to spy on MountWeather while being Dr. Tsing’s assistant.”

Then, something washed off any pride of her eyes: fear? concern? worry?

Titus had considerably softened, but his guard was still up. Gustus took a deep breath and Anya remained the same, but for her eyes that had narrowed a bit.

“No.”

_Wait, what?_

Lexa’s voice had been soft but firm. I looked at her in confusion, even Anya had widened her eyes in disbelief.

“Lexa, this is the opportunity we’ve been waiting for. We’ve spent a week trying to come up with a solution, now we have the perfect one.”

“No. It’s too dangerous.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“ _Heda_ , the girl seems pretty set on it…” Titus risked. 

“I said _no_.”

Lexa had raised her voice as well as herself and was now pacing back and forth behind the table

As for me, I wasn’t gonna have it.

“Lexa, I want to do this. I’ve seen the Walkers, I want to stop it as much as you do. Please, let me help.” 

“Leave us.” 

I wasn’t sure if she was talking to me, but before I could move, they got up and left the room.

I guess she was talking to them.

I walked around the table and stepped in her way to confront her.

“Lexa, why won’t you let me help you? Do you not trust me?”

Her green stare was set into mine, her eyes lowered a few inches down to meet mine. 

“It’s not you I don’t trust,” She said softly. “it’s them. They’re dangerous.” 

“And that’s why they have to be stopped.”

“I won’t gamble with your life for inside information.”

“Well, what did you expect when I said I had been offered the job?”

“Exactly this.”

She had barely whispered the words. I was sure now that it was worry that clouded her eyes.

“Would you let Anya do it if she was in my place?”

“Yes.”

Her reply was immediate. 

“Then, if you do trust me, what does she have that I don’t?”

She sighed deeply not answering. Her gaze wondered on the side of the room for a moment, then down at our feet before coming back up to meet mine. I could see the concern burning in her eyes clear as day.

It made my heart race up. I took a step toward her, standing just a few inches apart.

“Let me do this, please.”

Her eyes flickered to my lips for the briefest moment before she seemed to regain her stoic composure.

“You know it’s ultimately your decision to make.”

“I know, but I still want your blessing, Lexa. I _need_ it.” 

Now my eyes flickered to her deliciously plump lips and lingered there for a while.

The tension was real.

“I only ask that you trust me, Lexa.” My eyes slid back up to hers and I saw they were darker. 

 _God_ , I was in so much trouble.

“Besides, I’m a pre-med student who wrote a paper on the company, I could probably understand their jargon fairly easily.”

I was desperate to give us something to avoid the ever growing charged tension between us. My voice was huskier than usual when I finally brought myself to speak again.

“I know I won’t get caught if we’re in this together.”

 I truly revelled in the prospect of working closely with her.

 _Late night coffees at Grounders_ … There was no way in hell that it was going to happen like this, it would more likely be in a private secret place like this room. And it would possibly involve more people. 

Still. I was allowed to fantasize.

Then, it occurred to me what I had to do to convince her, to give her no choice but to accept. I tried to hold back any lust that clouded my eyes when I burned my gaze into hers again, wanting only strong determination to show. When I spoke, my tone was strong and firm.

“So what will it be, Commander? Will you let me help you take down MountWeather?” 

She never blank once, never betrayed any emotion, but the clenching of her jaw gave her away to me. I knew she’d been affected by my words, calling her the Commander.

“Before I agree to anything, I need you to remember, Clarke, that victory stands on the back of sacrifice. This will require you to make sacrifices along with hard choices. You might even be faced to killing at some point. Are you sure this is what you want?”

“Yes.”

I couldn’t bring myself to say anything else because there she was, in all her Commander glory and I felt what I first felt when I met her at the facility, that day I knew I would follow her at the end of the world if she asked me to. Right now, I knew that I would not only follow her anywhere, but I would also do anything for her.

I was giving her my life at that moment and I never wanted anything more.

 “Then let’s burn them in fire and drown them in blood.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter featuring one of Clarke's wet dream.
> 
> You can listen to "Good Guy" by Zayn Malik (Icarus Falls) whilst reading. I was inspired by the song's tone and I included some of the lyrics here and there.
> 
> Hope you like it!

**[Clarke:]**

The sunrays were lighting up the trees in a piercing green shade that I knew too well. Thanks to the intensity of the dawn, it seems I could see drops of light on the leaves and spots of gold on the ground: it felt magical, like we were hiking through an enchanted forest. Everything around us was quiet, peaceful, natural.

He walked a step ahead of me when he let go of my hand to turn around and face me. I saw his mouth move when he dropped to one knee, but couldn’t hear anything. My mouth opened in disbelief, instead of looking at the boy who loved me, I was seeing Lexa standing behind him, her intense gaze piercing my eyes. Hands behind her back, face as stoic as usual, something in her demeanor was animalistic, predatory. I was drawn to her, my whole body responding to her calling, I wanted nothing more but to drink her voice and get drunk on her words.

When she spoke, her mouth moved in sync with Finn’s and their voices blended together.

“Don’t you fall for me girl, I’m not the right kind.”

Then she disappeared. I looked around for her, but she was gone. I looked back at Finn who still was kneeling, his eyes plunging into mine but never like hers did.

“I’m a bad man.”

He took my hand and I was sure he was going to propose.

“I will do what I can to keep you by side, just ‘cause I know it feels right.”

 

The bass was thudding hard in my skull and the dim lights of the club didn’t help my diziness.Or maybe it was the alcohol, although I didn’t feel drunk. I found myself standing in the middle of the dancefloor, merely crushed by sweating bodies moving around me. I glanced around, hoping to find an empty spot where I could manage a breath.

Then, I saw her.  _Obviously_. 

She was leaning against the bar, a glass in hand, the other hanging lazily from the counter. Dressed in an impeccable black dress that showed off her strong shoulders and her long neck, her hair was waving down one shoulder and of course, her green eyes were burning right into mine. She brought the glass to her lips before leaving it behind, slowly stalking towards me. I was frozen in place, but I didn’t have any desire to move anyway.

Her hands found my hips when she got to me and she led my body to her rhythm. Slow and sensual. I grabed her tight arms, my fingers grazing over the tribal tattoo she sported on her right upper arm. She brought me closer and I could almost feel her lips tracing a line from my neck to the end of my shoulder. I couldn’t do much but let out a moan as I felt shivers flowing the entire length of my spine. I could almost feel her warm breath on me as she nozzled through my hair, and then, as if she had read my mind, she whispered in my ear:

 “Hope you feel my presence, ‘cause it’s making a feature.”

Her words were as cryptic as they were obvious.

My skin was left burning everywhere her fingers lingered on me and I got drunk on the low growl that escaped her throat when she grabbed my ass. I was so lost in her, I could barely support myself. Working on instinct, my hips bucked against hers, my hands gripping her back while I shamelessly started to rub myself against her. My mouth latched onto her neck, but I couldn’t quite feel anything under my lips.

 

Suddenly, I was floating _._ My legs were wrapped around her waist until she threw me on the bed. Her eyes were dark when she stared down at me, standing on her knees between my own. Her tongue slowly licked her lips as she was taking me in, spurring on the animalistic desire that lingered between us.

Then, she was on me without warning. I felt the tiniest itch on my neck where I knew she bit me hard. I still moaned, I just couldn’t help it, and wrapped my legs around her once again. The sunlight coming from the window lit up her bare skin in a golden glow and I was hypnotized by the motion of her back waving as she rocked her hips hard between my legs. The visual was enough to get me off. 

I threw my head back against the pillow, barely holding back the sounds coming out of my mouth. I trailed my nails down her back, but I couldn’t feel anything other than a slight resistance. I pushed my hips up to meet hers, trying desperately to feel her, but she shoved me back against the mattress with a very powerful hand. I never saw her eyes when she moved south on my body with her lips leaving a trail of burning desire on my naked skin. I closed my eyes, thinking it might help me feel her touch and when I opened them again, I saw a glimpse of hers before her mouth was on me and her face disappeared behind her brown locks.

I screamed at the thought of her tongue sliding through my wet folds, at my hands grabbing her head and roughly pushing her against me.

 

I woke up panting, my lungs grasping for air and my hands between my legs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a total of three scenes to the dream, separated by an extra space between the paragraphs: I want to keep the flow as "natural" as possible and not put an emphasis on the separation of the scenes. If it ends up being just confusing, I'll add a clearer separation for next time.


End file.
